»first september.
Saturday, September 1, 2012
well, i guess, i started a blog because i need somewhere to release my emotions instead of spamming my twitter which is link to my facebook. sigh.
well, there is a lot i'm really holding in. i'm totally dying to release it. cry it all out, pour it all out. i feel like shit right now.
please stay strong mother, i beg you. i want you to be there for me. supporting me and pushing me to overcome the obstacles in life and listen to me nag about it. thank you for being patient with me. i am trying my best to be your ideal daughter, a daughter that you'll be proud of. i promise, in the future, there won't be anything for you to worry about but only to just live your life. i'll be their to support you in return and make you happy. thank you for everything mother, thank you.
this year, you faced hardships because of brother. his stupid attitude. he is totally becoming like me mother. is it my fault? should i change him? i know i should but he is stubborn mother. a day before your birthday, you had to hear the news of brother being caught in jail. on 12am sharp, the start of your birthday, you had to go all the way to Jurong to ail him out of the jail. i'm sorry i wasn't there with you mother. but, from your voice, i can sense the sadness within. seeing your face which held your emotions; tiredness, sadness and the pain within. you told me you were mad at brother, you told me you were sad that he is in jail, you told me it hurt to see him in jail, is that how you felt when i once like brother, mother? did i made you feel that way? to that extent or worst? i'm sorry. i'm sorry that this year, you had to face your birthday this way.
there was once, brother almost became expelled from his poly. you sat with me, thinking about the money and our financial problems. you said "i'm tired. i'm sick and tired of this. i feel like running away. i don't want to face this family anymore. i want to run away." and you ran to the kitchen, crying to yourself. hearing those words, it hurt me so much that i ran to my room crying. i called brother and scolded him vulgarities. and i managed to force him back to school. he had to knee down to beg for forgiveness. both of you were crying so badly at that time that it bought back memories. i remembered i was once like that, once in that situation. and you gave us a chance. you forgave us. thank you mother. being a mother is hard. i can see it in you. i appreciate and am grateful to have a mother like you.
yesterday, the teacher's day performance was awesome. i totally love IDC crew and the Runaway. omfg they were so awesome hahahah i was totally glued to their performances and.... of course, they are good looking guys, what did you expect huh? i fangirled like crazy ok. omg hahahahhaha i feel like fainting whenever i think about it! :P oh and the shocking performance was the first performance by the indie band from the sec 5 and 4. omfg so cool pls. they have talent, they should be in a band, wait an official band and perform more items! so cool pls. DAEBAK! after school, my best friends, wani and fatin went to causeway point, including myself of course for a mini shopping for our raya outing with our schoolmates! wani managed to get 2 pairs of shoes within her budget which was $60. each pair cost $19 or $20 if you round it up actually. it was worth it and totally pretty. i got my fake eyelashes and other make up accessories. wani was heading to fatin's house to prepare herself since she can't go to her house since its faaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaar.i love you mother.
by 3.30pm, they arrived. had a lot of fun times while raya-ing with them. a total blast! a total of 21 people (Edwin, Qian Wei, Richard, Oliver, Haryati, Nelly, Indra, Syahmi, Faris A, Faris B, Eric, Julia, Syafiq, Fatin, Hadi, Anuwarul, Ebnue, Wani, Amir, Samuel and me.) Hahahha, uploaded the pictures on facebook and some are at instagram (@smexysupergirl) and some are in Julia's (@coffeeaddic1ts) and Wani's (@unsteriorey) instagram! i'll try to upload some of the photo's in my blog. oh and we had couples within us. well, only for that day of course.
Dull Yellow Couple; Julia & Anuwarul
White Couple; Eric & Ebnue (acceptable because they're gays!)
Grey Couple; Nellysha & Hadi
Blue Couple(s); Fatin & Shahmi, Haryati & Qian Wei
Peachy Yellow/Orange Couple; Syafiq & Julaiha (me!!!!!)
its fun because everyone was having fun well, except me halfway through the outing. had that call from brother that he was caught in jail and ergh, why my post like colourful. eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeek. hehehhe i wanted it to be plain and simple but heh it failed. My house was first, followed by Eliza's, Indra's, Nelly's, Hadi's, Haryati and then Fatin. I couldn't follow the rest to Syafiq's house because i had to go to the police station with my parent. sigh. from 6.30pm, i kept receiving phone calls from both my parent asking about brother. i had difficulties enjoying my raya sia. what was touching was, the girls actually stayed back and waited for me. i was touched. they were there for me and omg i feel so touched and blessed to have them here for me. thank you girls. anyway by the time i reached home, it was 11pm and i was fast asleep. well, what can i say. i was too darn tired :")
anyway, here are some of the photos! Enjoy your day people xx.
words spilled @ 6:19 PM /
leave goosebumps here ⋄
